RHCP used to rock the fucking house! What the hell happened? Why has everything that was awesome in the 90s turned into a big steaming pile in the 00s?

Another question: why do I feel really sad when I see the neglected dogs on those ASCPA commercials, but I don’t really care when I see the starving kids in the Christian Children’s Fund commercials?

Also, in case you missed it while this was making the rounds on the Internets a few weeks ago: SFW Porn. For realz!

This morning I got in my car to go to school, and I noticed a piece of paper on my windshield. So I got out and read it, and it said:

Check your engine area. You have a kitten inside. Call xxx-xxxx if you find it.

So I popped the hood, and goddamned if a real live fucking kitten didn’t jump out! It ran away into the back yard before I could grab it. I hope my dogs don’t eat it if it’s still back there…

Anyway, I called the number, and a lady told me that her daughter spotted the kitten apparently disappear under my car’s hood (don’t even ask me how it managed that), and was terrified that I would start the engine and vaporize it or something. To be completely honest, I did start the engine for about 10 seconds before I saw the note and turned it off, so I (and the cat!) was very lucky that the kitten wasn’t sitting near the actual engine block when I started the car. Funny story: when I turned the engine off, I heard a “meow!” coming from under the hood and had a total WTF moment.

So I wonder how the kitten got in there. Or maybe it was born inside, confirming my theory that all car engines are actually cat-powered, and gas pumps actually dispense water with special cat steroids that make the cats super fast.

In other news, we watched “Harold and Kumar Go To White Castle” in my cinema class yesterday. Now, I’ve seen a lot of really crappy movies lately (300, Transformers), but this was just one of the worst fucking movies I’ve ever seen. And the worst part is that the numb-fuck retards I go to school with thought it was the absolute height of comedic genius. It was like a flashback to my sitcom class a few semesters ago when I had to suffer through an episode of “The Single Worst Sitcom Ever Produced, Ever,” better known in America as “Two and a Half Men,” while these stupid pieces of shit all around me cackled like loons. I hate my generation. Seriously.

So I was just reading a Wired article about how Pink Floyd’s “Echoes” syncs up with 2001: A Space Odyssey, and I was watching the video to prove the point, and I realized that Pink Floyd makes, by far, the most boring music I have ever heard in my life. I mean, “Wish You Were Here” and “Comfortably Numb” were pretty good tunes, but that’s about it. There is no more effective deterrent to drug use than the realization that you might actually enjoy wasting all your time listening to that meandering garbage when you’re high.

Cool Stuff:
Why you should never ask for help on the Internet - OP is obviously new here.
The list of dumb 34 - this is just plain funny. And I don’t know why, but the description for number 11 almost made me piss myself laughing.
For most people, college is a waste of time - you know, every day I wish more that I had just gone to a tech or vocational school instead of college. At least then I might actually have learned something, other than how it feels to pay a metric assload of money without receiving anything in return except some glorified sheepskin receipt. This article hits the nail on the head.
Woody and Tinny words - classic. A good, woody sort of sketch.

So I just found out that Don LaFontaine died on Monday. You might not know his name, but you definitely know his voice. Just think of pretty much any movie trailer from the last few decades. You know, “in a world…” I’m a pretty big voice-acting geek, so I’m surprised and saddened by this news. However, this does mean his position is now open, and I believe I’m the right person for the job. Hollywood, give me a fucking call. I have a million voices - each one more awesome than the last! I can’t order a pizza without the person taking the order having an orgasm. Remember watching the Olympics? Fuck no you didn’t, because it was actually just me, describing how I thought the Olympics should go. My voice is just so awesome that it can make you see amazing shit. I gave Phelps 8 gold medals! I created the Chinese women’s gymnastics age controversy! Me!!

Next Olympics: Dinosaurs on unicycles. Suck one!

So, after 3+ years as my faithful companion, my Powerbook G4 just had it’s very first kernel panic. Maybe it really is time to upgrade to the Macbook. Good thing they’re (probably) being revved early next month, although I am a little wary of buying 1.0 rev electronics. Maybe I’ll just pick up a refurb from the current generation after the brand new ones come out.

I also got a text message from Amazon informing me that Nintendo Wiis were in stock. I was so close to buying one, but I keep coming back to the idea that I’ll probably only use it for a couple weeks and then get bored of it. I think I’m just going to look around for a good deal on Lego Mindstorms. At least with them I can build an unholy army of the night to do my bidding.

I think I saw a shooting star last night while I was returning home from purchasing delicious beef jerky. Would you believe that it was the very first time in my entire life that I’ve seen one? Wacky.