RHCP used to rock the fucking house! What the hell happened? Why has everything that was awesome in the 90s turned into a big steaming pile in the 00s?

Another question: why do I feel really sad when I see the neglected dogs on those ASCPA commercials, but I don’t really care when I see the starving kids in the Christian Children’s Fund commercials?

Also, in case you missed it while this was making the rounds on the Internets a few weeks ago: SFW Porn. For realz!

You know what, Governor Palin, it’s pronounced “NU-CLE-AR.” Just because that fucking douche in the White House has been saying it wrong for the last 8 years doesn’t make it right. And you know, it’s amazing how consistently mispronouncing a very common word can make you sound like a complete fucking retard who doesn’t know what she’s talking about.

Good on ya for bringing the “Terrorists hate our freedom!” line out of retirement, though. Well played, Governor, well played.

This morning I got in my car to go to school, and I noticed a piece of paper on my windshield. So I got out and read it, and it said:

Check your engine area. You have a kitten inside. Call xxx-xxxx if you find it.

So I popped the hood, and goddamned if a real live fucking kitten didn’t jump out! It ran away into the back yard before I could grab it. I hope my dogs don’t eat it if it’s still back there…

Anyway, I called the number, and a lady told me that her daughter spotted the kitten apparently disappear under my car’s hood (don’t even ask me how it managed that), and was terrified that I would start the engine and vaporize it or something. To be completely honest, I did start the engine for about 10 seconds before I saw the note and turned it off, so I (and the cat!) was very lucky that the kitten wasn’t sitting near the actual engine block when I started the car. Funny story: when I turned the engine off, I heard a “meow!” coming from under the hood and had a total WTF moment.

So I wonder how the kitten got in there. Or maybe it was born inside, confirming my theory that all car engines are actually cat-powered, and gas pumps actually dispense water with special cat steroids that make the cats super fast.

In other news, we watched “Harold and Kumar Go To White Castle” in my cinema class yesterday. Now, I’ve seen a lot of really crappy movies lately (300, Transformers), but this was just one of the worst fucking movies I’ve ever seen. And the worst part is that the numb-fuck retards I go to school with thought it was the absolute height of comedic genius. It was like a flashback to my sitcom class a few semesters ago when I had to suffer through an episode of “The Single Worst Sitcom Ever Produced, Ever,” better known in America as “Two and a Half Men,” while these stupid pieces of shit all around me cackled like loons. I hate my generation. Seriously.

So I was just reading a Wired article about how Pink Floyd’s “Echoes” syncs up with 2001: A Space Odyssey, and I was watching the video to prove the point, and I realized that Pink Floyd makes, by far, the most boring music I have ever heard in my life. I mean, “Wish You Were Here” and “Comfortably Numb” were pretty good tunes, but that’s about it. There is no more effective deterrent to drug use than the realization that you might actually enjoy wasting all your time listening to that meandering garbage when you’re high.

Cool Stuff:
Why you should never ask for help on the Internet - OP is obviously new here.
The list of dumb 34 - this is just plain funny. And I don’t know why, but the description for number 11 almost made me piss myself laughing.
For most people, college is a waste of time - you know, every day I wish more that I had just gone to a tech or vocational school instead of college. At least then I might actually have learned something, other than how it feels to pay a metric assload of money without receiving anything in return except some glorified sheepskin receipt. This article hits the nail on the head.
Woody and Tinny words - classic. A good, woody sort of sketch.

The Fairy Feller’s Master Stroke - widely overlooked, sort of bizarre, based on a painting by Richard Dadd, but a very good Queen song. And from a technical standpoint, it’s absolutely mind-blowing. Put your headphones on, and just listen to how many amazing things are happening in this song. Try to go through a couple times and focus on one element (vocals, harmonies, guitar, bass, drums) each time. If you don’t think Freddie Mercury is unbelievably talented already, just try recording harmonies like that yourself! Make special note of the vocals at around 1:51, when Freddie sings, double tracked, “And the arch-magician presides / He is the leader.”

For those who may not know, double-tracking is a recording technique where the singer records one track, and then goes back and records another track of the same lines, trying to match as closely as possible. Due to the very slight variations in the way the singer records each track, the vocals end up sounding “fatter.” This is much harder to do than it sounds. In fact, the story goes that John Lennon used to hate the tedious process of double tracking so much that he had his engineers develop a method of doing it automatically using a second tape machine and a variable delay. You have to use a variable delay, because if you have two exact copies of a track and just slightly delay one of them, you’ll get an effect called flanging. Even if you don’t know what the effect is by name, you definitely know its sound. Here is an example.

Anyway, on this line, Freddie sings the second take so accurately that it produces a slight flanging effect! It’s ridiculous!

Finally, pay special attention to John Deacon’s incredible bass line. John Deacon may not be a monster like John Entwistle of The Who, but he can definitely hold his own and then some, as this song shows. To get a better understanding of what’s going on with the bass part, check out this video of a very talented bassist playing along to the song.

And now you have a greater appreciation for an under-appreciated song by one of the greatest bands of all time.